Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Finding the Quiet

I'm thankful for the snow. 

I'm in awe of how it forces me to slow down. Gone are the days of summer and fall where I can drive some where, anywhere without giving it a second thought. Here I sit today, cozy warm in my house, no where to go, all commitments canceled. Thankful for the snow. Thankful for its powerful ability to re orient my whole day, my day I had planned out before the snow arrived in a flurry. God had this day my day all planned out too.

"Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." Proverbs 19:21 (ESV)

This idea of slowing down, has been something that continues to surface itself in my heart these days. I think it has something to do with that wall, the one that is my heart, which was stripped bare. In my brokenness God is pulling out all sorts of things, and in the process He is revealing areas of quiet that have always existed, but rarely noticed.

Hear me, oh please hear me when I say, that I have plenty of "quiet" moments in this little white house with a green door. When I am home in the evenings, I come home to quiet. Chase and I don't create a lot of noisy chaos. Sure our little Marley likes to voice his opinions at times (isn't that what dogs are supposed to do?) but for the majority of the time, our house is quiet, as far as the noise level goes.

So here is where I struggle. I wrestle with being quiet. Quiet on the inside. When I have the time to sit still, I rarely take it. I like to get things done, busy myself with unnecessary tasks, (such as search every online store known to man for the warmest most durable winter boots out there. NO JOKE) I am distracted on so many levels, my mind being pulled in so many rabbit trial directions, I forget that being quiet, the holy kind of quiet, is the most productive thing I can do.

This brings me back to winter. As the snow blew in late last week, and has continued to fall, my initial reaction was less than pleasant. I was grumbly. Then, as if God positioned me right back in front of the barren wall, my grumbly spirit was hushed, and broken I stood again.

Eucharisteo! Euchariseto! Eucahristeo! Cries my heart.

This fluffy white snow and the black icy roads are my euchairsteo for today. They are a physical reminder of the change God is doing within. For today, I have been given the gift of true quiet time, which might not be so tomorrow or the next day as I, along with many of you, adventure to vocations, meetings, gatherings and so much more.

To be completely open with you, today I was scared to be gifted so much time. I know myself well enough to know that I struggle to use my time in an un- busy, un-hurried way. "Help me Lord!" was my plea,  "Give me the grace and strength to be quiet today, I desire to be a good steward of the time you have given, but I so easily wander. Guide me Lord, lead me back to the cross all day long. Put your Holy Words before me, the life breathing, better than anything on this earth words!"

The fact that you are reading these very post, shows that the LORD is answering my cries for a quiet spirit today. Typically I can't sit still until late evening to write. My presence here on this blog, is a practice in quiet. It is here that I wrestle, grow and submit to HIS WAYS. Written words help me to see what I feel in my heart. Writing it down, solidifies for me what it is that Lord is doing in me.

In my quiet, the Lord is leading me, showing up in the still places of my heart and beckoning me to come. To Be Still. And so today, I'm praying on your behalf for safety on the roads, clarity of mind and the humility to find and relish in the quiet with me.

To GOD be the Glory!

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