Today is one of those days...
I don't mean the kind of day when everything seems to be going wrong, or one of those days when I am OVER joyed about some special event coming up. No, today is one of those days where I am thankful.
As I sit here in our humble cozy home reflecting on so many of the things God has chosen to give me during this season of life, I can't help but smile at the blessings that surround me! In reality, The "things" I am thankful for, aren't things at all. When it comes down to the heart of my gratitude I am most thankful for those circumstances, lessons and challenges that have directed my heart back to the Cross of Christ. Through every season, even seasons filled with many changes and challenges when often I feel/resemble a nomad in search of a resting place, God's faithfulness is unwavering.
Change. By NO means am I a cheerleader of it! In fact when I know change is on its way into my "orderly-rhythmical life" I cringe! I set up my own picketing corner, around the walls of my heart and pray it passes quickly! Even as a little girl, I can remember clinging to the mundane. Loving that my family never moved houses, and that I went to a small "safe" school, playing with my few close friends, and requesting the same foods for lunch everyday. I thrived in my secluded familiar world. Then, I began to see that life beyond elementary and middle school had more choices and "unknowns" involved. Such as, when/where will I take driver's ed? Where should I get a job? what sports should I play? What Colleges do I apply to? Who will I marry?
The decisions came slowly and less weighty at first, and then suddenly as though someone was shaking my undisturbed life through the many holes of a salt shaker; faster than I could organize the granules back together; Change was upon me. The life-altering, never-the-same, am-I-going-to-survive kinda change. It was through all of these transformations in life, that I began to see the one thing that always stayed the same. God's unwavering faithfulness. I don't know about you, but for this girl who loathes uncertain diversions and unfamiliar soil, the reality that God will NEVER change is like drinking that refreshing glass of water after a 10 mile run. It is the reassurance to me, that no matter how out-of-control my life circumstances may feel at times, the One who is in control of it ALL is ALWAYS watching, waiting, listening, and loving.
Through my few years here on earth, God has begun to do a work in this ordinary heart of mine. He has revealed to me that my perception of change has been quite jaded at times, and even very sinful. He didn't create me to stay in my comfortable little life, re-living the same scenario day after day. He created me to be more than just ordinary. My life is more than that, because I was created by an awesomely Holy God to live an extraordinary life for HIS glory!
As I begin another year, another week, another hour, I want to surrender this consistent "need" knocking on the surface of my heart, to stay in this warm cozy moment. Lord, please give me the grace to see the unknowns that come my way, as stepping stones to make much of you! I desire to be a courageous adventurer who isn't afraid to step out into the battlefield of uncertainty. With you O Lord, I will NEVER be alone. In your mighty Name you can move mountains, even the mountains of change.
